Generation Z: An Honest Account
This isn’t intended to glorify drug use nor is it to put further shame upon it. Its being written to de-stigmatise and educate, as best as you can, on the use of drugs. As well as giving an honest and personal account of my use of drugs and how I think it adds and, or takes away from my life.
I’ve been using drugs for at least the last 3 years now, throughout which usage has ebbed and flowed, and I wouldn’t say that I’ve ever ran into any particular troubles or issues. In fact I would say that experimenting with different drugs over these past years has played a huge role in shaping the person I am.
Using drugs has brought me closer to the people I love and helped me accept the person I am. However there is a certain stigma that can be felt around taking drugs, in certain circles, and an aspect of guilt that comes with it, for me personally. All this being said, as I am experiencing, there are some things to be weary of when taking drugs and things to bear in mind.
I would say that for a while now I’ve had a feeling that something isn’t quite right in myself, my existence and more so the world in general. I think this feeling is present in everyone, to some degree, and we all have ways of covering this up and hiding it from our consciousness. I believe this feeling of angst has been ever-present throughout my life, although I may not have sensed it at certain times, in hindsight I can see how its been there all along.
This feeling has characterised itself in many ways throughout my life, the sense that getting a new “thing” or getting a new jumper will make everything alright. Exercise and some type of sport has always played a large part in my life and I think that this has been an effort to hide the existential angst that has been lurking there. And to some degree, throughout the last 3 years drugs have been used for this purpose too.
Whether it was the first time I took a pill and experienced the pure ecstasy and love that comes with that and wanting to feel it again and again, the use of Acid to naively try and find the missing piece of the puzzle we live in, which of course I have not found and I doubt, I know, it cannot be found. And the periods of doing ketamine every weekend or conversely sniffing coke at the pub every Friday, weeks on end.
All of this is and was an attempt, I believe, to find something that I feel is missing from myself, and like I said, something I don’t think I’ll ever find.
That being said my main motivation behind using drugs has always and will always be to have a good time and connect with the people I am with. However I can’t help but think that there’s some subconscious motives behind my drug use.
